"Pork and Beans" ...Asian Style (Chinese Long Beans with Chilies and Garlic)

Chinese Long Beans with Chiles and Garlic

Sometimes home cooking can induce just as powerful a craving as your favorite restaurant dish.  Logic would imply that we’d usually crave the MOST outrageously decadent and delicious things we can get our hands on, but I think you’ll agree that’s not the case.  And thank god.  Constantly coveting blue cheese-stuffed foie gras with bacon sprinkles would leave us all fat and broke.  Well, some people are fat and broke without the foie gras, but that’s beside the point.   Cravings are mysterious.  Even those of us lucky enough to have access to the exotic cuisines of the world (delivered in 30 minutes or less) can find themselves obsessing about the simplest things.  That’s how this dish is for my sweetheart and me - sometimes nothing else will scratch the itch.   When it’s that time, there’s a 2PM text that says something like:  Hey! How about that spicy pork thing tonight?  The answer is, without variance: Yes.

This recipe was adapted from Madhur Jaffrey’s version.  I bumped and tweaked the seasoning and reduced the liquid.  You can adjust for taste.   This one is hard to mess up (unless you burn the garlic, in which case your kitchen will bequeath the resulting smell to your progeny and to theirs after them). 

1 lb ground pork

1 – 1.5 lbs Chinese long beans

2 Tbsp. vegetable oil

7 - 8 large cloves garlic, peeled and diced finely (if it looks like way too much garlic, you’re on the right track)

3-4 serrano chilies, seeds included, diced or sliced very thinly

1 ½ tsp brown sugar

2 Tbsp. fish sauce

2 Tbsp. soy sauce

¾ cup water

1 tsp paprika

SUBSTITUTIONS: You can substitute Thai chilies, red jalapeños, whatever you like.  Just adjust the amount added for the heat of the chili. We like it spicy so I leave in the seeds.  Instead of Chinese long beans you can use regular green beans.  However, the long beans are worth getting for their extra-crunchy texture and woodsy flavor.

Heat oil in wok over medium high heat.  Add garlic and chilies and stir a few times until garlic is just barely starting to brown.  Add pork and cook, breaking into small pieces, until it is just cooked through.  Add remaining ingredients and stir to combine.  Cook on high heat, turning over 3-4 times, until most of the water has evaporated, about 5-6 minutes.  Serve over hot rice. 

EASY, RIGHT?   Let the cravings begin. 

Let's play "Where's White Girl?"

This map of the Bay Area popped up all over Facebook last week.  Wanna venture a guess at my neighborhood?  


Thankfully still close to the Mexican border, because fried rice cravings can only be rivaled by taco cravings.  Oh, and near the GayTown border where I go to work out, unmolested, at my nice clean gym.  God, life is grand.

YES YOU CAN! ...Make New Year's Dumplings

Gung Hay Fat Choy!  Yep, even after 3 years of Mandarin classes I still say it the super-whitey way.  It’s a hard language, OK?

With the feasts, parades, monetary gifts, candy, superstitions and firecrackers, Lunar New Year is like Christmas, Thanksgiving, Halloween and the 4^th of July rolled into one.   Seriously: get on board. 

Being a culturally sensitive Californian means a formidable number of holidays to thwart your New Year’s resolutions.  After January 1^st caps off else’s celebrating, we fire up the Yule Log all over again on the 7^th for Orthodox (Russian) Christmas.  Then Chinese New Year comes knocking, followed by Easter and THEN Orthodox Easter… and then we just have April through October to work off all the turkey, wine, vodka and piroshky before we start all over again.  Thank god they threw Lent in there or we’d all have one politically correct foot in the grave. 

So you know: Chinese New Year is a “real” holiday here.  People take time off with their families.  There’s a giant parade, music, people celebrating in the streets.  It’s not like, you know, Kwanzaa or something.  My 7 year old stepdaughter came home last week and informed me that this year we “honor the dragon”.  Mind you, she attends Catholic prep.  I imagine all the Irish parents grumbling behind closed doors about their kids studying that “f-ing Oriental horoscope bullshite” in school.  

Given we’re not Asian, our celebration’s contained to 1 day and consists of giving out HongBao (red envelopes) with a VERY small amount of money in them (after two Christmases, Santa’s a broke-ass), and of course DUMPLINGS.   They’re easier than they look so don’t be intimidated by the folding.  By next year my stepdaughter’s will be better than mine. Although she does have those pirogi-making babushka genes. Not fair!

I’ve used this recipe for years.  You can double or triple the recipe as they freeze well.  Freeze them in a single layer first before transferring them to a large freezer bag or Tupperware.  Otherwise they’ll stick together.  

CHINESE NEW YEAR DUMPLINGS

For Dumplings:

½ lb Napa Cabbage, very finely chopped. (regular green cabbage will work)

1 tsp salt

1 bunch green onions or chives, finely chopped

3 Tbls sesame oil

1 tsp sugar

¼ tsp white pepper

1 egg white

1 Tbls Chinese rice wine

½ lb. ground pork

25 dumpling wrappers

For Dipping Sauce:

2 Tbls Chinese Rice Wine Vinegar

2 Tbls soy sauce

1 tsp sesame oil

1 Tbls chili paste

(mix together and serve on side)

MAKE THE FILLING:

Toss the cabbage with ½ tsp of the salt and allow to sit for 20 minutes.  Drain any excess water and stir in the green onions. 

Mix sesame oil, sugar, remaining ½ tsp salt, white pepper, egg white and wine into the pork.  Add the cabbage and green onions and mix well. 

FOLD THE DUMPLINGS:

Place a small bowl of water next to your workspace.  Place about a tablespoon of filling in the center of a wrapper.  Dip your finger in the water and trace the rim of the wrapper to help it seal.  

Pick up the wrapper in a taco shape and, starting at one end, create folds and seal the sides of the wrapper together into a half moon shape.  **Beginner tip:  Start with a smaller amount of filling in the dumpling until you get the hang of making the seal without everything squirting out the end.

COOK THE DUMPLINGS:

Bring a large pot of water to boil.  Add dumplings, cook for 7 minutes then drain.

-OR Potsticker Style-

Place several dumplings in a large skillet.  Add ½ inch of water and bring to brisk simmer.  Cover and cook until water is gone and dumplings are browning, shaking pan to dislodge dumplings from the pan.  

TA DAAAA!

Henry's Hunan Chinatown -

Why are there so few Hunan restaurants?  It’s a mystery and a travesty.  Every time I go to Henry’s Hunan I’m terrified that my subconscious might have, in hindsight, magnified the level of deliciousness, and that I will inevitably disappointed.  It never happens.  It’s always more stupidly tasty than I remember.  I inevitably leave, waddling, with chili smears and a drunk happy look on my face. 

Today was my first visit to the Chinatown location.  Obviously a visit to San Francisco’s Chinatown has a lot to do with where to eat.  If you’re the bunghole that leads your compatriots into the King of Crappy Frozen Dumplings, well you’ve pretty much ruined the experience for everyone.  Thank god for Yelp, you say?  Well then, smarty pants, why are Yelpers so ga-ga for House of Nanking?  Take a pass on House of Nanking unless you enjoy holding up the wall outside for an hour before eating average dishes.  Bee-line for Henry’s instead.  Preferably, wear some kind of elastic waistband. 

It's a very modest spot.  A few laminate tables and barstools downstairs by the kitchen.  Go up a few raggedy stairs to the upper level, where your plates rumble upstairs from the chefs via an old, narrow dumbwaiter.   They've spent more time on the food than the decor... and it was time well spent.  

What to eat:

Spicy Rock Cod:  A must-order.  Inside the (not greasy) breading is a huge mass of juicy white fish.  There is ared, spicy sauce full of pepper seeds all over it.  With white rice to cut the spice, it’s perfection.   Get this or the Braised Rock Cod.  Even if you NEVER order fish.  Just this one time.  Trust me.

Harvest Pork:  Not a diet dish - absolutely amazing.  Full of umami and delicious barely- crunchy cabbage. 

Hot and Sour Chicken or Beef (or anything):  (NOT the same as sweet and sour).  This is one of those special Hunan flavors.  Lean and full of al-dente carrots.  They achieve a true sour flavor in the background, unlike most crappy sweet and sour which is, let’s face it, mostly just sweet and icky. 

Shrimp with String Beans:  Only if you like salty dishes (black bean sauce on this, I believe?).  If nothing else, order because they know how to cook a shrimp to perfection, which is a rare talent to possess. 

Orange Chicken:  I can’t believe I’m writing the words “Orange Chicken” but if you’re in a group, there’s always ‘that person’ who will insist.  And it’s actually pretty delicious and full of fresh citrus.  They also exercise artful breading restraint. 

For more tips, check out this fan who has reviewed EVERY dish on his site.  That's love, my brother.  http://greasepig.com/henrys/menu_2.html